Does Anybody Know That You’re a Christian? (Or, How Come Generation Y Doesn’t Talk About Religion?)

Good post. I’m here because of my spiritual beliefs, as are many of the people I work with and for whom we work. That said, I don’t talk about my beliefs at work because I hate it when other people talk to me about theirs and just assume that I agree with them or I’m “wrong” or “evil” or “going to hell.”

Perhaps in the South (especially in the Texas South) it’s different–in fact, I know it is because I’ve met more than a few Virginia Baptists who were as moderate and pleasant as warm milk and who had definite opinions about the kind of “Baptists running around down in Texas” that were neither moderate nor pleasant.

I’d love to say that talking about faith wouldn’t be so political, especially in an area where the work we do can be so rewarding in walking out our beliefs, but it is. When your boss decides he or she is going to “witness” to you–at the same time that they are recommending you (or not) for a new job–it’s hard not to play along, even if their religious beliefs are highly incompatible with your own (this happened to a friend of mine.) But even in my own work, I have donors who view the work that my organization does as a “victory for a Christian God” even though we are not faith-based, and work with plenty of Muslims, Buddhists and Athiests and Agnostics. When it’s time for them to write a check, it’s again hard not to play along even if my view of our work isn’t anywhere near to theirs.

I have seen, though, on several occasions where open, frank discussion of faith has been positive. The founder of my organization did it because she was explicitly moved by her faith to do this work, and it’s been radically profound work. She is firm–and vocal–in her beliefs, but she was also equally firm in allowing others to be firm in theirs. “I’m a Christian, and I try to be a real Christian every day. If you’re a Muslim, I don’t care, but don’t be a fake Muslim–be real and we’ll be fine.”

One of our problems is that we don’t want to get bogged down in too much religion without denying that a lot of our programming is based on spiritual wisdom from the Bible. The minute we become just an “evangelical” program, we’ve lost the support of the Methodists and Presbyterians, not to mention the not-so-religious men and women who work with us because they’re good people and not motivated by any religious belief.

Bringing religion into the workplace, even a nonprofit, and especially if the nonprofit isn’t a church or religiously affiliated, adds a whole level of complexity for everyone–and I mean everyone–that is usually easier to avoid. Our solution has been to create a set of “driving values” that are core to our organization and fulfilling our mission, but also flexible enough for anyone, religious or not, to buy into them at a fundamental, human, emotional, ethical level. We’re in the process right now of driving those values even deeper into our staff, clients and volunteers. I can believe in fun, innovation, excellence, accountability, wise stewardship, etc. for my own personal reasons, just the same way as some of my strong Christian friends can believe in them for their own reasons. Yes, it puts a distance between us, but that was already there–at least this way we have something to talk through without the threat of abuse of power.

But, that said, I don’t know with the exception of a couple of people that I’m close to what other people in my age group believe, either. But maybe that’s part of the age–we don’t know. I wonder if you asked that same question in 10 years what the answer would be?

I am guilty of this, and one of the reasons is becuase of what @MlliItchell stated “.. the fear of overstepping those “boundaries” or offending often stops me from it..”and I know that it is no excuse. And I am guilty of this because of the bad rap that my religion gets. I am a Chritian and I display it in many ways including the service I provide to my community..and Oh how I would love to call it what it really is- A Ministry- but instead I remain PC

This is such an interesting topic that sprouted up from a video I ran across last night. I think faith is one of those taboo topics like politics that we aren’t to discuss in polite company but in actuality we may be missing out on great teaching/learning moments. How can we understand each other if we don’t know what the other believes? Their motivation? Their reason for being? In that same vein, have we yet discovered our own?

I’m not encouraging impressing our beliefs on others at all, quite the opposite, in fact. Its just in the moments of vulnerability when we open up or truly seek to understand, we usually benefit more than we’ve given. Just some things to think about.

Honestly, 2 of my best college memories come from random talks. A late night study session when we somehow started talking about faith vs. religion and sitting in the hall with another freshman I didn’t know as she talked about her upbringing and the impact of going to schools where no one looked like her. Very insightful, not “PC” at all.

@Andrew – Thank you so much for commenting here. I think your experiences add a lot of value to this conversation. I wonder if the question of whether to share & talk about religious beliefs is not a yes/no, but perhaps a why/when. Your example of your founder makes sense to me and doesn’t seem to have had any negative effects for the organization. Good question about the age dynamic – could be it IS a generational thing?

I don’t talk about religion because I’m an atheist. Funnily enough, lack of a religion is relatively taboo as well. Consider the controversy over the bus ads here in Seattle, bought by two atheist groups, that read “Yes, Virginia, There Is No God” and other such variations. They were vandalized and condemned for being “negative” and contrary to the holiday spirit. I’m not surprised. Perhaps like many Millennials, I consider religion (or lack of it) a private matter, and don’t support proselytism of any belief. Sure, I’ll talk about religion, or lack thereof, or variations on it, but only with open-minded individuals (many of whom apparently read and commented on this post!)

I think that in a professional environment, we shouldn’t be blatantly proselytizing, but we shouldn’t shy away from sharing things we learn from our faith. As a Christian, I believe our best witness is applying the values we know are true, along with allowing people to choose not to believe what we believe. I think there’s a fear out there that we will offend, but I thnk it’s more that we will be rejected by others if we share our faith. My hope for our generation is that we will all be whatever we are, with no fear and we will respect decisions others make due to faith, as long as they don’t cause physical harm( i.e. bombing abortion clinics, killing gays, bombing churches and other houses of worship).

I don’t talk about religion for fear of being judged. Like Elizabeth, I’m an atheist (and a Bright http://www.the-brights.net/), and while Canadians in general seem to be less outwardly religious, faith still exists. Gallup polls in the US have shown (if I recall correctly, I don’t have the source) that the public is more likely to vote for a person who is gay or of Muslim faith to be President than an atheist. We’re not all that highly regarded as a generalization.

I agree with Elizabeth, “Perhaps like many Millennials, I consider religion (or lack of it) a private matter, and don’t support proselytism of any belief.” I’ll only have conversations about religions in what I feel to be safe spaces.

I would rather connect with people because we share similar values, regardless of where those values come from.

I am loving the disucssion that is forming from this post! First, I want to share a discussion that spurred on my faceobook page after I posted this video. I’ll just call my friend “EJ”:

EJ wrote: I don’t understand what the message is… Can’t you be a good person (by showing good actions, which he criticized–but I must have misunderstood this b/c good actions can’t be bad!) or by following another religion or belief system?

Me: Hi- your point is very well taken. I believe we all should do good regardless of whatever dogma we each prescribe to. The reason I was so moved by this video is because as a Christian, I feel the work that I call my “purpose work” is a direct effect of my relationship with Christ. I don’t take this as saying only Christians can do good. I take it as saying if you are going to calll yourself a Christian, you need to be bold about it and walk the walk. I fully respect those around me and around the world who are doing amazing things every day of their lives and don’t sit next to me on Sunday mornings. It doesn’t discount the good they are doing. This discussion came up on my twitter feed last night around this video and here is a blog one of my colleague’s wrote about it.
http://ow.ly/N2vT

EJ wrote: Okay, that makes sense, and I agree–as a non-Christian, that is. It wasn’t clear to me when I first watched it. It might have simply been the wording and rhythm he used. But I think essentially, it means having convictions and following what you believe. I wasn’t offended, and I certainly hope I didn’t offend you or any other viewers:) Thanks for passing on the blog.

Me: No offense taken. The beauty is that we can have this conversation and respect each
other for it.

EJ wrote: Absolutely!

Hi Rosetta — glad you and your friends brought this topic up. I’m a practicing Roman Catholic, and proselytizing is not a huge part of my spiritual upbringing. I prefer to let my actions and decisions (i.e. “works”) speak for themselves (though I’m sure I often fail at that).

That said, when I encounter someone who wants to discuss faith, no faith, my faith, their faith, etc., I eagerly jump in, no matter if it’s in a professional or personal environment. My only criterion is that they want to learn — and teach — through open-minded conversation.

I’m not sure this is generational. I think if anyone wanted to change the PC culture, and make spiritual beliefs/thinking more transparent, our generation could do it, because we would reframe it as necessary for honest collaboration and appreciation. Not agreement, per se, but at least understanding that religious beliefs (whatever they are) are part of a complex whole.

I had an interesting experience with Christian evangelization last year that I blogged about at the time:
http://www.juliarocchi.com/2009/01/evangelization-study-in-conflict.html

And here’s a Jewish perspective on it:
http://www.juliarocchi.com/2009/02/follow-up-evangelization-jewish.html

It might interest your audience. Looking forward to everyone’s continued discussion!

Maybe your sample is skewed? When I was at the University of Colorado, there was no shortage of people foisting their beliefs upon others, and youthful religious gatherings in DC are common (they can be seen wearing red tape/over their mouths at the SCOTUS.)

Maybe “How come ‘progressive’, Democratic Generation Ys don’t talk about religion” or “Why have liberals ceded all talk of religion and faith to conservatives?” would be more fitting.

I’ve struggled with this issue a lot, people know I am a Christian, but I think they know because I tell them. Unfortunately, I almost feel like when they know that I’m a Christian, I’m under pressure to put on a good persona and ‘act christian’. Another big struggle is becoming marginalized because of my association. Ever since I became a christian, people look to see if I’m offended when someone cusses or tells a dirty joke. Or even worse, apologizes to me, when they say something offensive. Something that is so important to me, my faith, is hard to hide. I identify myself as a child and servant of Jesus Christ. I struggle with how to balance my professional work life, and my personal faith and not let them be seperate entities.

I love the running theme here around the importance of finding and creating safe spaces for people to be comfortable in sharing their spiritual and religious beliefs. The fear of being open about who we are in that part of our lives seems to be in worrying about what other people will say or think about us.

@Elizabeth & @Trina: Thank you for sharing your experiences around being atheists. I remember when I was taking religious studies & philosophy in college, my grandmother worried that I would become an atheist and I was sure she would disown me if I did. The problem with her assumption is that it implied that not only was there only one faith (in God, specifically in Jesus Christ), but that I shouldn’t even associate or try to learn from others who did not share that faith. But I realized that being around people of different beliefs in no way threatened my own. I wish more people would figure that out. Having an Atheist for a friend or a coworker in no way makes me less Christian or other people less of their faith.

@omari: great questions. what I’ve noticed in many progressive political orgs, is that people tend to avoid discussing their faith, christian or otherwise. It doesn’t mean that people don’t care about religion nor does it mean that being a liberal/progressive and being a Christian have to be mutual exclusive.

There are lots of reasons why there is often a general avoidance of not wanting to even discuss religion. One possible reason is that it’s not considered “proper” to talk about faith/religion in some circles. Another reason is that some folks aren’t religious. Somehow, being ‘inclusive’ of all religions can sometimes mean not bringing it up at all as to avoid conflict.

I am a Christian, but I also believe in what bell hooks and cornel west call the “love ethic”…for me, my passion for social change and equality comes from my love for Christ and what the ways in which I have seen God’s love in my own life and the lives of others.

I’ve also met people who believe in Liberation Theology–the religious and spiritual tenet from which leaders like Dr. King and Ghandi found their mission and vision….same for Malcolm X as well….remember, his values and goals began to change after his hadjj to Mecca.

@Rosetta: I had the same experiences with my family. They knew when I got to college I would meet people who were muslim, jewish, atheist, agnostic, ba’hai, etc. But there was still an assumption–and perhaps a level of fear–that by having friends with and learning about their point of views it would mean I’d completely abandon my faith….but of course, it doesn’t happen that way.

I was a little surprised by this post – I’ve seen a lot of conversation about religion. In my personal life, I’ve been lucky in that I have circles of friends where we definitely do talk about our beliefs! In college, I was part of an interfaith group of students representing the various religious groups on campus. That group was very open and accepting of each others’ beliefs; it was why we were all meeting together in the first place – to learn from each other.

As for the college as a whole, however, I know it wasn’t nearly that accepting. I heard from various people that it was hard to be Christian on that campus because there were a lot of hurtful jokes and stereotypes about Christians on that “liberal” campus. I remember someone saying it was easier to be Pagan on that campus than Christian – but there were certainly unpleasant stereotypes about Pagans, too.

And still, with people of our generation or other generations, I’m always a little hesitant to discuss my religious beliefs for fear of stereotypes about Paganism or stereotypes about people who are religious more generally.

I think our generation has a lot of great motion toward becoming more accepting and creating more dialogue (take the Interfaith Youth Core for example). I’ll have to echo Andrew’s question about what this conversation would like 10 years from now – I’m quite curious to see how our generation will grow.

Religion is a very touchy subject. At the radio station we cater to people of vastly different religions.

Does Anybody Know That You’re a Christian? (Or, How Come Generation Y Doesn’t Talk About Religion?)

Not everyone might know that person A is a Christian but not everyone might know that person B is happily not a Christian. Some people just might not want to know someone else’s religion or any other personal information. What happens when someone decides to say “None of your business” for what every reason they may have. They might feel that they should have not even had to say that. Unless the job is religious in nature it should be totally a non factor at work. I welcome anyone of any faith to be on my radio show since my show is not about religion but the “Gospel Grace” (a Christian show) would seem that they’d want Christians. A Muslim could literally host the show but that would seem unauthentic which would be self-defeating.

I am open to dialog amongst to the people on my show. Understanding and maturity go a long way having a happy group of co-workers. To be honest, I can’t call it but religion is the last thing I’d want to divide the people on my show especially since it is not a part of my show.

@Julia: Thanks for sharing your experiences around Christian evangelization. As a Christian, I was taught that in order to be a true believer you have to share the gospel with the world, which I never felt comfortable doing. I was never interested in converting anyone. I felt like I had enough work on my hands in trying to be a good person without adding the additional burden of convincing others to accept Jesus into their lives. I also thought it was intrusive. If someone were to ask me about my faith, I still would not ask them to “try Jesus” or anything like that. I typically explain why I personally believe and leave it at that, hoping others will be inspired by my story. That said, however, I was very disappointed when I moved to DC and didn’t know anyone yet – and nobody invited me to church. Not one person. In college, people invited me to church all the time, and it was an easy way to connect with others you shared a common bond with. So I guess it goes both ways.

I found this post interesting as well. I currently go to a public university in an area of my state that is rather conservative and dominated by the Christian Reformed Church. Needless to say, anyone who doesn’t belong to the CRC is often a bit uncomfortable in proclaiming their beliefs; they don’t want to lose friends or possibly fail to get a job, internship opportunity, etc through their religion. They also don’t like it when someone finds out what their religion is and tries to convince them to change it, or looks down on them because they don’t have the same beliefs. Our campus has had several religious extremists come by, and they give Christianity a bad name as well, since they preach hate rather than love.

I also find that there is a decent sized segment of our campus population that simply does not care for organized religion; they might have grown up as a Christian or belong to another religion, but that is no longer cool, and it conflicts with their desire to do whatever they want, regardless of the consequences. So, they push religion to the back of their minds, so they don’t have to act a certain way.

As for myself, I am willing to talk to people about religion; I tell them why I beieve what I believe, listen to what they have to say, and we usually find some common ground and some areas where we disagree. We always go awaywith a better understanding of one another, and it’s done in a respectful manner. I feel that discussions like these along with demonstrating faith through your works (an oft misunderstood concept) are better testimonials than trying to force beliefs on someone else.

Elizabeth Clawson,
How long will the FFRF go on positively affirming God’s non-existence without evidence?

Is this not what they condemn as “faith”?

They are doing it this year and they did it last year:

http://atheismisdead.blogspot.com/2008/12/dan-barker-and-neo-pagan-atheism.html

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I tend to agree with Patrick on this one. Learning and understanding other people’s faiths is great, but unless you work in an explicitly religious workplace, keep it out! Get coffee after work or something. One thing that I think religious people sometimes find difficult to understand is how marginalized Atheists feel in any religious discussion. Even if I’m not involved, if I’m at work and people around me start talking about religion, it becomes clear in almost every case that I am the only one who doesn’t think there’s a God… even if I never have to mention it, if I’m never asked, the marginalization still occurs.

Its the same concept as telling racist jokes at work or something like that: it’s not allowed at all because even if the person telling and the person listening are both OK with it, in the workplace, there’s always someone else who hears. And that puts that person in a difficult position they never should be put in… ignore it to maintain good relations with co-workers? Or report it, and be a “snitch?” Even when people object to what’s going on, in a workplace, particularly a friendly one where people get along well, the pressure to conform is going to make someone feel marginalized, and that’s not something that should ever occur at a secular workplace.

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